The Queen...part 1
I've been apprehensive to blog about this particular person as there is a fair chance that my house might get burned down should we get back in contact with each other, but it's been a few months and I think I'm safe...
This will be a multi-part entry - I'm not sure how many parts at this point because if I included everything I could probably go on for a couple of months, but The Queen represented my "real" introduction to dating in Anchorage - heaven knows I made mistakes in this thing too, but it got weird with The Queen and it got weird real quick. As you read this entry and the following parts you will probably ask yourself, "why the hell didn't he just get out?" That would be a fair question - and to be honest I should have run for the hills almost immediately, but The Queen has a way of sucking you into her world - and even if one doesn't like that world one might think they could make it better. Plus, I have a lot of patience - but a lot less so after this experience...
The Queen came shortly after "The Condo Hunter" (a subject of a future post). I was minding my own business one day when I got a notification of a message on my myspace. This is very odd for me because I'm more of a facebook guy and only have a myspace to keep up with my siblings (they blog on there and e-mail me). Even more surprisingly it was a woman - and an attractive one at that! The message was to the effect that she thought I was cute and should talk sometime. Now, back home I almost never got hit on, I did okay, but I was never the guy that women would approach and it wasn't because I was intimidating - you would never find me on the cover of GQ, for example. So, a few e-mails and I was off on a date. It went pretty well, but I made one cardinal mistake that men and women make every once in awhile - I slept with her on the first date! This was not a problem at the time, but it became more so because of another mistake...
...About two weeks before the message from The Queen I went on a date with "The Illini" - a very nice woman (missing out on that is probably the biggest regret I had in Anchorage). She went on vacation shortly after our date and I told her to get back to me if she wanted to go out again. Well, a week went by and then the second week went by and she never got back to me (it turns out this was just a very long vacation - she hadn't seen her family in months). The mistake definitely wasn't going out with The Illini, but I should have wrapped that up fully before dating (and sleeping with) another person. I didn't so about a week after The Queen and I started dating The Illini called, back from her trip and looking for a night out with yours truly.
A week was enough to see that The Illini was a much better woman for a long term type of relationship and that The Queen was going to be more difficult. So I had a few options - dump The Queen, go with the Illini and hope for the best, stick with The Queen because I was an idiot thinking with something other than my brain and hope the Illini would be available after the divorce, do something that is normally unthinkable for me - play the field, or tell the truth and probably end up alone. I went with the last choice - I told The Queen first about my situation and that I felt the need to be honest with her and that I would like to keep dating, but to keep things non-serious. This was the first DTR conversation I had with The Queen and she had already locked in pretty heavy on me so she was none too pleased to hear that a woman that I had written off was trying to come back into my life and that I was open to the proposition.
I learned that day that honesty is a bitch - but it was much better than a simpleton like me trying to "play the field." The Queen, while upset, said that she appreciated that I told her the truth and that she would kindly never want to see me again. I was honest with The Illini and told her I went on a couple of dates while she was gone, but that I was alone yet again - she was okay with that - everything was still casual.
A couple of days later - after a second date with The Illini - I got a mysterious message from "Shredder" - saying I was cute and she was new and needed someone to show her around town. I responded (learning my lesson) that I would be more than happy being a new friend (at the time I didn't have many in town), but that I couldn't be more than that. Almost immediately after I got a message saying that I was "caught in the act" and that The Illini would soon get a message detailing my transgressions. The message also stated that Shredder was a friend of The Queen. The Illini soon sent me a message from Shredder saying what an evil guy I was, how I liked to hurt women for fun, and how basically I was a Nazi that liked to eat small children. I told The Illini that I wasn't that type of guy, but that perhaps she should look elsewhere for a guy while I dealt with an obvious stalker who hated me.
Very shortly thereafter my phone rang and it was The Queen - she had a small household emergency that she needed help with and I was the only guy she knew that could help her. Cautiously, and stupidly I might add, I went over to help. There really wasn't much of a problem, but one offer from The Queen to give a massage, some low light, and a movie later I was back in The Queens web.
As I type this out I think the readers can see where this might be going, but I guess I was just an idiot and didn't connect the dots right away - if you're in my shoes at the time I'm still extremely naive about Anchorage women and didn't think one would go to these lengths to keep one. If you haven't connected the dots already - congrats on still being innocent and be careful as this might happen to you!
In any case things were awesome - for about a week. There was some regular female companionship, cooking for one another, cuddling, movies, dates - it was good. Then came the fights. These weren't your knockout, dragout numbers mind you - I don't anger very easily. However, invariably I would do something wrong - not make a date on the day she wanted, not say the right thing, etc, etc that would set The Queen off. These fights would never get settled, but rather she would go down to her car parked in my driveway and text me from there and continue the fight by texting or calling. It was all very passive aggressive. This would end after a night and her saying that her new friend, Shredder, work, stress, or something was making her crazy. Either that or I would get tired and promise to do better - there was about a 50/50 ratio of the former to the latter.
Some of our fights - in no particular order -
1.) I saw a movie we were supposed to see at a friends bachelor party (a very tame bachelor party, dinner, movie, and a night out on the town, but who I was to veto the movie - I was just an usher!)
2.) I told the story of how The Queen and I got together too often because I "wanted people just to say I was still a good guy"
3.) I would rather do laundry than spend time with her (I had a two week long trip in 6 hours and no clothes)
4.) She wasn't comfortable sleeping at my house (various reasons - some funny, some not)
5.) She thought a co-worker liked me
6.) I wasn't really "there" in the relationship
7.) I didn't say I missed her enough (I was gone for a week)
So at then end of part one I've made a few mistakes and ended up with The Queen, the fights have started and I'm a miserable person, but the worst...that's yet to come...
Until Part Deux...
AirForceKush - aka - The Arctic Fox
This will be a multi-part entry - I'm not sure how many parts at this point because if I included everything I could probably go on for a couple of months, but The Queen represented my "real" introduction to dating in Anchorage - heaven knows I made mistakes in this thing too, but it got weird with The Queen and it got weird real quick. As you read this entry and the following parts you will probably ask yourself, "why the hell didn't he just get out?" That would be a fair question - and to be honest I should have run for the hills almost immediately, but The Queen has a way of sucking you into her world - and even if one doesn't like that world one might think they could make it better. Plus, I have a lot of patience - but a lot less so after this experience...
The Queen came shortly after "The Condo Hunter" (a subject of a future post). I was minding my own business one day when I got a notification of a message on my myspace. This is very odd for me because I'm more of a facebook guy and only have a myspace to keep up with my siblings (they blog on there and e-mail me). Even more surprisingly it was a woman - and an attractive one at that! The message was to the effect that she thought I was cute and should talk sometime. Now, back home I almost never got hit on, I did okay, but I was never the guy that women would approach and it wasn't because I was intimidating - you would never find me on the cover of GQ, for example. So, a few e-mails and I was off on a date. It went pretty well, but I made one cardinal mistake that men and women make every once in awhile - I slept with her on the first date! This was not a problem at the time, but it became more so because of another mistake...
...About two weeks before the message from The Queen I went on a date with "The Illini" - a very nice woman (missing out on that is probably the biggest regret I had in Anchorage). She went on vacation shortly after our date and I told her to get back to me if she wanted to go out again. Well, a week went by and then the second week went by and she never got back to me (it turns out this was just a very long vacation - she hadn't seen her family in months). The mistake definitely wasn't going out with The Illini, but I should have wrapped that up fully before dating (and sleeping with) another person. I didn't so about a week after The Queen and I started dating The Illini called, back from her trip and looking for a night out with yours truly.
A week was enough to see that The Illini was a much better woman for a long term type of relationship and that The Queen was going to be more difficult. So I had a few options - dump The Queen, go with the Illini and hope for the best, stick with The Queen because I was an idiot thinking with something other than my brain and hope the Illini would be available after the divorce, do something that is normally unthinkable for me - play the field, or tell the truth and probably end up alone. I went with the last choice - I told The Queen first about my situation and that I felt the need to be honest with her and that I would like to keep dating, but to keep things non-serious. This was the first DTR conversation I had with The Queen and she had already locked in pretty heavy on me so she was none too pleased to hear that a woman that I had written off was trying to come back into my life and that I was open to the proposition.
I learned that day that honesty is a bitch - but it was much better than a simpleton like me trying to "play the field." The Queen, while upset, said that she appreciated that I told her the truth and that she would kindly never want to see me again. I was honest with The Illini and told her I went on a couple of dates while she was gone, but that I was alone yet again - she was okay with that - everything was still casual.
A couple of days later - after a second date with The Illini - I got a mysterious message from "Shredder" - saying I was cute and she was new and needed someone to show her around town. I responded (learning my lesson) that I would be more than happy being a new friend (at the time I didn't have many in town), but that I couldn't be more than that. Almost immediately after I got a message saying that I was "caught in the act" and that The Illini would soon get a message detailing my transgressions. The message also stated that Shredder was a friend of The Queen. The Illini soon sent me a message from Shredder saying what an evil guy I was, how I liked to hurt women for fun, and how basically I was a Nazi that liked to eat small children. I told The Illini that I wasn't that type of guy, but that perhaps she should look elsewhere for a guy while I dealt with an obvious stalker who hated me.
Very shortly thereafter my phone rang and it was The Queen - she had a small household emergency that she needed help with and I was the only guy she knew that could help her. Cautiously, and stupidly I might add, I went over to help. There really wasn't much of a problem, but one offer from The Queen to give a massage, some low light, and a movie later I was back in The Queens web.
As I type this out I think the readers can see where this might be going, but I guess I was just an idiot and didn't connect the dots right away - if you're in my shoes at the time I'm still extremely naive about Anchorage women and didn't think one would go to these lengths to keep one. If you haven't connected the dots already - congrats on still being innocent and be careful as this might happen to you!
In any case things were awesome - for about a week. There was some regular female companionship, cooking for one another, cuddling, movies, dates - it was good. Then came the fights. These weren't your knockout, dragout numbers mind you - I don't anger very easily. However, invariably I would do something wrong - not make a date on the day she wanted, not say the right thing, etc, etc that would set The Queen off. These fights would never get settled, but rather she would go down to her car parked in my driveway and text me from there and continue the fight by texting or calling. It was all very passive aggressive. This would end after a night and her saying that her new friend, Shredder, work, stress, or something was making her crazy. Either that or I would get tired and promise to do better - there was about a 50/50 ratio of the former to the latter.
Some of our fights - in no particular order -
1.) I saw a movie we were supposed to see at a friends bachelor party (a very tame bachelor party, dinner, movie, and a night out on the town, but who I was to veto the movie - I was just an usher!)
2.) I told the story of how The Queen and I got together too often because I "wanted people just to say I was still a good guy"
3.) I would rather do laundry than spend time with her (I had a two week long trip in 6 hours and no clothes)
4.) She wasn't comfortable sleeping at my house (various reasons - some funny, some not)
5.) She thought a co-worker liked me
6.) I wasn't really "there" in the relationship
7.) I didn't say I missed her enough (I was gone for a week)
So at then end of part one I've made a few mistakes and ended up with The Queen, the fights have started and I'm a miserable person, but the worst...that's yet to come...
Until Part Deux...
AirForceKush - aka - The Arctic Fox
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