That Old Familiar Feeling...
Well, there really isn't too much new to report about the women of Anchorage as I'm not on the dating scene right now, but I thought I would blog on some facets of my new (now getting older) relationship with The Blockbuster.
First, and the title of the post, I'm getting a familiar feeling in my relationship. Oh, I don't mean in a romantic sense, but (as unromantic as this might sound) I'm getting used to my new girlfriend. She's becoming a facet of my life and feels, well, familiar to me.
This has the effect of making things a bit more complicated in the future as eventually, as all relationships must, our relationship must evolve or die. Oh, maybe I'm just being a bit melodramatic here, and this any decision will not have to happen for months at the earliest, but eventually she or I will have to get to a place where we decide we'll want to take this to a higher level (ultimately out of Alaska for her and me settling down) or we'll find something about one another that will prevent this from occurring.
The choice, albeit down the road quite a ways, worries me. At the end of the day I want a positive reason to stay with someone, not a negative reason to stay with someone. By that I mean (at the risk of sounding like a woman from a romantic comedy) I want the head over heels feeling, that exciting feeling, an affirmative feeling that I'm doing the right thing. These feelings may grow over time, and I do like The Blockbuster - she's a very good girlfriend and those 'like' and 'familiar' feelings could grow into something great and lasting.
The bottom line is that these familiar feelings make this eventual choice more complicated. If there were no feelings, just a general fondness that comes with any relationship the choice would be easier to make and the relationship easier (but not easy) to end when the time came, but like the old song says, "I've become accustomed to her face."
Ok, when you read the last line try to imagine the tune and context of My Fair Lady or it just looks even weirder than a guy quoting a Broadway musical.
This also has led me to a bit of a new truth about myself - I've had a bit of a sea change in my attitude with women that I might have mentioned, but this is the first time I've seen it in a relationship. It used to be that I worried about finding a woman that would like me enough to be the person I grow old with, but now I don't worry about that - I worry that I'll end up with the wrong person. That also leads to the fear that when the times comes I won't be able to pull the trigger and end up with that right person for the fear that I'll end up with the wrong one. This is the ultimate reason I want that surety, that certainty that hopefully comes with meeting the right person.
Or it could all be bullshit and we're all deluding ourselves. However, I don't think that's the case. I'm not a philosopher or any sort of expert, but even in my experience different relationships have led to a whole host of different feelings, but more importantly, different lessons learned. At the end of the day I think this may be another one of those learning experiences. I wish most of these didn't come with hurt feelings, crazy girlfriends, or uncertainties, but I suppose that's the only real way for people to learn lasting lessons. In any case, with different people causing different feelings, I don't think it's too crazy to think that there's at least one person I'll meet on my path in life that will make this all worthwhile.
Well, sorry if that's a bit too much of a ramble, but these subjects have been weighing heavily on my mind recently. The only answer to all of this is time, and over that time I'll make sure to keep you posted on this illustrious blog.
Until next time, keep in mind that the rain in Spain falls mainly on the plain...
AirForceKush - aka - The Arctic Fox
First, and the title of the post, I'm getting a familiar feeling in my relationship. Oh, I don't mean in a romantic sense, but (as unromantic as this might sound) I'm getting used to my new girlfriend. She's becoming a facet of my life and feels, well, familiar to me.
This has the effect of making things a bit more complicated in the future as eventually, as all relationships must, our relationship must evolve or die. Oh, maybe I'm just being a bit melodramatic here, and this any decision will not have to happen for months at the earliest, but eventually she or I will have to get to a place where we decide we'll want to take this to a higher level (ultimately out of Alaska for her and me settling down) or we'll find something about one another that will prevent this from occurring.
The choice, albeit down the road quite a ways, worries me. At the end of the day I want a positive reason to stay with someone, not a negative reason to stay with someone. By that I mean (at the risk of sounding like a woman from a romantic comedy) I want the head over heels feeling, that exciting feeling, an affirmative feeling that I'm doing the right thing. These feelings may grow over time, and I do like The Blockbuster - she's a very good girlfriend and those 'like' and 'familiar' feelings could grow into something great and lasting.
The bottom line is that these familiar feelings make this eventual choice more complicated. If there were no feelings, just a general fondness that comes with any relationship the choice would be easier to make and the relationship easier (but not easy) to end when the time came, but like the old song says, "I've become accustomed to her face."
Ok, when you read the last line try to imagine the tune and context of My Fair Lady or it just looks even weirder than a guy quoting a Broadway musical.
This also has led me to a bit of a new truth about myself - I've had a bit of a sea change in my attitude with women that I might have mentioned, but this is the first time I've seen it in a relationship. It used to be that I worried about finding a woman that would like me enough to be the person I grow old with, but now I don't worry about that - I worry that I'll end up with the wrong person. That also leads to the fear that when the times comes I won't be able to pull the trigger and end up with that right person for the fear that I'll end up with the wrong one. This is the ultimate reason I want that surety, that certainty that hopefully comes with meeting the right person.
Or it could all be bullshit and we're all deluding ourselves. However, I don't think that's the case. I'm not a philosopher or any sort of expert, but even in my experience different relationships have led to a whole host of different feelings, but more importantly, different lessons learned. At the end of the day I think this may be another one of those learning experiences. I wish most of these didn't come with hurt feelings, crazy girlfriends, or uncertainties, but I suppose that's the only real way for people to learn lasting lessons. In any case, with different people causing different feelings, I don't think it's too crazy to think that there's at least one person I'll meet on my path in life that will make this all worthwhile.
Well, sorry if that's a bit too much of a ramble, but these subjects have been weighing heavily on my mind recently. The only answer to all of this is time, and over that time I'll make sure to keep you posted on this illustrious blog.
Until next time, keep in mind that the rain in Spain falls mainly on the plain...
AirForceKush - aka - The Arctic Fox
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